Anyone Seen My Self-Esteem?

Your smile,

oh, your pearly white smile,

takes me away from reality,

up to the heavenly skies,

I’m floating on cloud nine.

Your smile,

oh, your shining bright smile,

makes my heart skip a beat,

a moment, frozen in breathless air,

I’m captivated, in pouring awe.

Your smile,

oh, your earnest, warm smile,

melts my hardest sorrows,

rains on me like water, so divine,

I’m drenched in your charming, heartwarming smile.

Your smile,

oh, your perfectly flawless smile,

envious, I am,

of your generous sincerity,

I am but enchanted,

I am but spellbound.

Your smile,

is all I ever know of you,

I reach, but I grasp firmly

on nothing but empty air,

in my reverie I drown,

in reality I while away

of a smile that will never be mine.

27/03/07, 4:13pm

As I stare

across the coal sky,

as my eyes ascend

to the glittery heavens,

as I stand alone

enveloped by the chill of night;

in awe, I admire

the floating moon

in a sea of stars,

how vast, the endless depth of

space spreads,

an object of desire

fulfilling my deepest, suppressed

requisite needs,

an appetite I cannot whet,

a thirst I cannot quench,

for things beyond,

afloat in the unreachable sky

that my raging curiosity muses over,

in search of salvation,

through passionate observing

of the Creator’s wonders

through my limitedly human senses,

granted generously

by the ever Almighty,

the ever Omnipresent,

the ever Gracious & most Merciful;

in realization, I am,

but a mere dot

in a harmonious sgalaxy,

in a massive, enigmatic universe,

so powerless,

so small.

26/3/07, 8.50pm

Newcastle

University

– A Mere
Step Away From Materialization!

After the rigorous 50 minute
interview held on

24/1/2007

,
a day I will remember in eternity, I finally received a conditional offer
letter from

Newcastle

University

last week. Ooh, the warm tears wetting my very eyes – I feel very much grateful
and alive!

For those who are not familiar
with Medical Interviews and what takes course prior to the interview, feel free
to refer to my entry ‘Nail Biting and Hear Tearing – Symptoms of Medical
Interview’.

Anyway, a conditional offer means
I am offered a place in the Medical School for the session starting September
2007, and is subjected to me meeting the minimum academic requirements (38 IB
Points for my final exams this coming May, roughly is 3.60 GPA for those not
familiar with the IB point system), proof of non-infectivity of Hepatitis B,
and an ‘Enhanced’ disclosure from the Criminal Records Bureau of Malaysia to
confirm my personal information and that I have no criminal convictions.

(Of all the sudden feeling glad
for resisting the thoughts of choking my annoying step brothers to death when
they were extra loud a few years back. Phew)

As if that wasn’t enough, with the offer letter was an
International Undergraduate Merit Scholarship (IUMS) offer by the University’s
Scholarship Committee, which has a value of £1,500 (that’s about RM10,
000!!) for the first year of my Medical
degree. Just in case you were wondering, it isn’t in cash, but instead payable
towards the fees in the first year.

All I have to say is this:

OH

MY

GOD!!

(Or in short – OMG. Oh, the joys of acronyms in SMS and
IMs!)

This is all almost too much, but guess I should calm down,
and heave a huge “Alhamdulillah” – Mercy to God, for this once-in-a-life-time
opportunity.

Thank you, dear God.

Still, can’t help myself - OMG! O.M.G! Oh.
My. GAWD. omg!! : D

Hahaha. Now all that’s left to do for me is study &
revise to ensure I meet that minimum requirement. And wait for the results of
my

Southampton

University

interview, get ready for my

Nottingham

University

interview this coming 21
March, and anticipate a reply from King’s College London. Greedy? N’ah, just
making good use of my 4 choices. God knows if I don’t meet the requirement for

Newcastle

& will be in the look for another in agony.

As the Malay saying goes, “Lebih baik sediakan payung
sebelum hujan (It’s better to prepare an
umbrella before it rains)”

Life is good.

5/3/2007

.
6:54pm