Anyone Seen My Self-Esteem?

"With hardship comes ease" - Quran, 94:5

Oh my. Did I exploded with all my might or what! Pondering upon the words coming from my own mouth, there was so much hate. Too much agony. Tumultuous PAIN. Forgive me, I just had to unburden all my supressed hurt. I’m not ashamed to admit, warm tears streamed like rivers down my cheeks, its’ warmth not only thawed the ice that plugged my heart, but also aided in carrying all my worries away. Nothing beats like a good cry. Ego set aside, let your emotions sink in, and your mind contemplate. Tranquility has never been so easy to achieve. But endure the wetness and messed up mind first.

It’s been months since that heart-wrenching incident. "Heart-wrenching" as in how vulnerable and weak I am, how uncontrollably emotional, how irrational.. I guess it’s part of growing up - enduring pain, breaking down when you can’t hold on any longer, almost giving up on hope. I’m sure everyone else goes through the same thing, right? But I’m sure in the end, I’ll be all grown up and looking back at where I was and with a grin on my face, ponder how I’d wish life would accelerate faster so I’d no longer bear all the anxiety of growing up an adolescent. Hopefully..

A string of incidents has taken place in my life of the late, so much that I don’t know where to start with. But alas, the future will look sparkling bright if I am resilient and strong. That’s what all this is about, right? Pain –> Depression –> Sheer Will & Positivism –> Maturity & repeat again. That’s what I think. Oh, the agony and twinge of living a teenager’s life

aLi-mCb

[2:40pm , 18/2/2006]

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